Love Or Loneliness?
This last week, I’ve been thinking about what Love means to me.
Does Love mean to accept someone else regardless of whether or not you agree with them?
In my opinion, if you disagree with someone on a regular basis, then you shouldn’t be together.
True, everyone is different, and no one should conform to another person just for the sake of getting along.
What if you don’t have any common interests with your partner, though? Are they still your partner if that is the case? What do you have in common?
Sex?
If you are in a relationship where you find yourself looking for common ground more than just being yourself and enjoying your time together, it might be time to start looking in another direction.
Why do couples stay together if they do not have anything in common? Why do they stay married or if they are not yet married, why do they feel the need to get married if in their hearts they know for certain that it’s just to make sure they are not alone?
Is the need to have someone there to hold your hand greater than the need for happiness?
Does having someone there to hold your hand give you greater happiness than being in love?
These are questions I’ve been thinking of answers to for quite some time. I don’t want to get married just for the sake of making sure I’m not alone. I want to get married for love, pure and simple. Sure, there are other deciding factors like credit, finances, family situations and stability. Also, it’s important to know whether or not you are dating a felon. At least, that matters to most people.
If you are with someone because you truly love them, usually you can look past any flaws they have, so long as they make things right with you and your relationship. If someone is $10,000 in debt but always makes sure to rub your feet every night before you go to bed, and takes you out to dinner every year on your anniversary, and tells you that you are the best thing that has ever happened to them…does the $10k really matter?
Does it?
Some people are obsessed with finding the “perfect” mate. I will admit, I am looking for my “perfect” mate.
What is your definition of perfect, though?
Does your mate have to have perfect credit?
A perfect smile?
Perfect abs?
What is it that your mate has to have in order to make you happy?
What do YOU look for?
hi
read your words and really appreciated your honnesty
so many people actually get into a relationship because oh one of the motivations you listed, although they wouldn’t recognize it for themselves. Being not married, I don’t know all the tips to find love… But I have understood that when you start with the basis to instrumentalize the other, to use him to fulfill smth in you, it’s a wrong start. only god can trully satisfy the holes that we all have in us because he made us with these needs. I think love involves both feelings and will, which makes it so strong…. But I think love is smth beyond emotions. It’s the choice to open up to sb, let him/her enter in your heart, and give yourself. It’s scary, makes you vulnerable and involves a lot of trust… But if you don’t open up, then you won’t get any response… The problem is to find the person trustworthy enough for you to open up.
See, I think I did my homework weriously
thank you anyways for what your wrote
Comment by Cloclo — March 16, 2008 @ 7:56 am
[...] recently read a post about love http://queenautumnlee.wordpress.com/2008/03/16/love-or-loneliness/ ; for some reason, it caught my eye, I was quite interested to read what this person had to say [...]
Pingback by LOVE… WHAT ABOUT IT? « cOcOtTe MiNuTe :))) — March 16, 2008 @ 2:38 pm
I think one of the most important things when looking for a mate is being able to recognize yourself in what he says/does/thinks…this is hard to explain. Aah. But there it is, and when it happens, you’ll know what I’m talking about.
Comment by Jessie — March 16, 2008 @ 7:08 pm